Sunday, October 07, 2007

The Curse of Sisyphus: The Neverending Season

“They had every right to boo tonight; we played terrible." - Jordan Lake, Baylor free safety

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Sisyphus Never Knew the Madness of Baylor Football

In Greek mythology, Sisyphus suffered the punishment of eternally carrying a boulder up a steep hill, only to have it disappear when he arrived at the top. This is the feeling the BearMeat Editorial Board is beginning to get watching Baylor football. What does it mean that Blizzle Szyzzle can put up 400 yards again if we can only throw one passing TD? What does it mean if Jordan Lake and Joe the Baptist play their hearts out, on par with some of the best defensive players in the nation if we can't manage to score? What does it mean if Brandon Whitaker plays some of the best football of his life if we give up 3 turnovers in the first half? Who benefits when David Gettis shows flashes of brilliant athleticism reminiscent of Dominique Ziegler when we get 11 penalties for 105 yards?

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The Ref Tackle: Classic Baylor Football

That was a pathetic performance. The irony is that we had the edge in total yards against CU. Even with such a high-powered offense, CU managed to spank us good, since they know something about execution. Our loss was a failure of play calling and execution. It hangs on the heads of both the coaching staff and the players. We were absolutely killed by a mediocre team last night. If anyone thinks they can argue that Baylor can give a conference opponent a competitive game this year, please submit your flat-earth theories in the comments sections.

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What about you, BearHat Dude? Care for a wager?

Perhaps GuyMo is all out of options. The Steele recruits are gone, the talent being brought in is medium-level at best, and he has a wacky offense that we just don't have the talent for. Our running game is a joke, our special teams looks like Cirque de Soleil out there, and our offense is perhaps the most impotent run-and-shoot system since . . . . ever.

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Judge Joy, Wallowing in the Melancholy of the '07 Season

Sorry, Bear fans, things are worse than we thought. This is going to be a very long season.

UPDATE: Thanks to Oso de la Sombra (Bear of the Shadows/Shadow Bear?) for this helpful scripture to get you through the week. Again, we mine the Book of Job (Ch. 29, Vers. 2-6) for its eternal applicability to Baylor sports:
"How I long for the months gone by, for the days when God watched over me, when his lamp shone upon my head and by his light I walked through darkness! Oh, for the days when I was in my prime, when God's intimate friendship blessed my house, when the Almighty was still with me and my children were around me, when my path was drenched with cream and the rock poured out for me streams of olive oil. "



  • Red,

    It's time to look to Job for guidance (see Job 29:2-6). Get out the sackcloth and ashes.

    By Anonymous Osodelasombra, at 1:27 PM  

  • Thanks, Oso!

    Your scriptural guidance has come none too soon.



    By Blogger Senior Editor Red Andrews, at 2:41 PM  

  • Doom, despair, and agony on me,
    Deep dark depression, excessive misery
    If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all,
    Doom, despair and agony on me.
    (courtesy of Hee Haw television show)

    New theme song of Baylor football.

    No wonder I refused to watch BU football for 6 years.

    By Anonymous poopsandwich, at 7:39 AM  

  • Actually there is STILL a carrot crop at the B. GUY MO's first class was actually Carrotman's last since all of Kevy's "recruits" were forced down Guy's throat.

    Love & Kisses

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:44 AM  

  • Poopsammich,

    Thanks for the song, buddy.


    Thanks for the clarification. Perhaps the ghost was premature.


    By Blogger Senior Editor Red Andrews, at 11:02 AM  

  • That looks like the Mexican Dorf with the bear.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:53 PM  

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