Monday, June 18, 2007

Around the Quad: The Loneliness of the ALICO

[Dearest Readers,

Today I write you all alone from the deserted confines of our office space on the 13th floor of the ALICO building. Gov. Pat and The Good Judge have apparently departed for the summer with out telling anyone, taking with them most of the per diem allotted for our trip to Fort Worth in September, a case of Rebel Yell, and three buxom interns. If you see these two old men, please contact Waco Crime Stoppers, or at least our attorney, Vic Feazell. With that distressing news, I bring you news from Around the Quad.


Red Andrews
Senior Editor]

1. New BearBacker: BoilerBabe. We would like to extend a hearty BearMeat welcome to BoilerBabe, a Purdue alum, law professor, and Chet Edwards supporter. Based on her biographical credentials and a thorough search of the law school faculty profiles, we believe this to be an accurate sketch of what "Pat" looks like. If you see her around town, be sure to say hello.

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BoilerBabe: Last Known Whereabouts - Health Camp

2. Aaron Bruce: Back from the NBA Draft. After dipping his big toe in the waters of the NBA draft, Aaron Bruce thought it best to stay in Waco with his hot girlfriend playing for Scott Drew than to submit his name for consideration in the NBA Draft. We're sure that after another year playing for Drew, Bruce will have the necessary skills to play for the Memphis Grizzlies, or even the Washington Wizards.

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Aaron the Bruce: "There are more available white women at Baylor than in Memphis; thus, I return."

3. Summer Guest Lecture Series: BearBacker Voices. Thanks to intense negotiations between our legal team and some of our BearBackers, we have hammered out a few preliminary agreements and option contracts with Jonathan Swanburg and The Razor to write guest columns for our blog. Since our interns have gone on strike and the editorial board is in disarray, we have requested that our friends contribute a verse to the cacophony that is BearMeat. Hopefully, this will keep our little coal-powered blog chugging along until our football season preview begins.

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Swan: Cali-Swagger Meets Holiday Cheer

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  • You go, Swanny. Apparently BearMeat doesn't need the statutory construction of the Big XII rulebook.

    By Blogger Poseur, at 2:27 PM  

  • We sure don't! Swan will drop mad knowledge on these here BearMeats. We expect nothing short of Moses coming down the mountain with two steamin' hot tablets o' truth.

    Break us off a piece, Swanny,


    By Blogger Red Andrews, at 2:54 PM  

  • Just to clarify, that's me on the right in the photo. Swanburg is on the left.

    By Blogger Mark Osler, at 3:42 PM  

  • It's a BLS invasion of BearMeat. For the record, Osler does not look like Mayor McCheese. He looks like a Fry Guy. I, of course, look like Grimace.

    By Blogger Poseur, at 3:51 PM  

  • Sweet...I'm on vacation!

    By Blogger Pat Neffistopheles, at 3:54 PM  

  • Prof:

    Hah! You've never looked better.


    Its an Umphrey Invasion - guard your net worth.


    You bring the wisdom, we'll bring the nachos.

    Gov. Pat:

    Come back to the BearMeats and steer this ship safely back to port.

    By Blogger Red Andrews, at 6:20 PM  

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