BearKatMeat: What the Eff is a BearKat
But enough with my conceited thoughts. Let's get down to the real business of explaining and detailing what exactly a Bearkat is. To put it frankly, it's was hard task to take on. But I'm a BearMeat guy, and a BM guy is meticulously molded and sculpted into a thorough researcher and all-around Hardy Boy. Ladies love BM; scholars worship BM. It's a good life.
Anyway, my first lead regarding the mysterious Bearkat started at www.gobearkats.com. Immediately upon entering said site, I recoiled in terror and pain as my retinas were tattooed with a color as frightening as...as a Bearkat? If the Shorthorns' color is burnt orange, then I would have to say that the Bearkats' color is more of a putrid orange, a very...bad orange, a "eat a whole pumpkin while chugging Lone Stars with Red Bull and take a deuce on a Pi Phi's doormat" orange. Somehow I fought through that, as BM would, and came upon a little blurb in a timeline about Bearkat athletic history:
April 1, 1923 - Sam Houston State joins the Texas Intercollegiate Athletic Association (TIAA), its first intercollegiate athletics conference affiliation. During the 1923 season, Sam Houston adopts "Bearkats" as the nickname for its athletic teams. The name comes from a slogan of the time "tough as a Bearkat!" The spelling with a "k" instead of a "c" denotes a mythical creature.
Wow! Awesome! I want to be a "mythical creature!" If I had known about this years before, who knows what powers I could be wielding today. Thunderbolts! Throwing Hammers! Lizards Embedded With Firecrackers! Sticks With A Little Dog Poo On The End!
I was pretty much set to believe bearkats.com, until I visited my number one go-to site for information and infotainment, urbandictionary.com. This shit will blow you away. Not only did I find a definition of Bearkat; I found the meaning of Bearkatt! According to Sam Houston State logic, the extra "t" means extra mystical; therefore extra accurate! Behold:
A large, fat, hairy, t-rex like short armed, fat jimmy dean sausage fingered, man-like teenage creature. Lives off Ranch Dressing, wears capri sweatpants, mismatched socks, wears a dirty stained jersey, and bathes up to 2 times per week.
Oh my god that is one quart of Ranch on your burger, you are fat Bearkatt.
"Dibs on the Ranch." (Bearkatt)
Stop pouring gravy up your nose Bearkatt.
Perfect! Now this is what I envision when I think of Sam Houston State, Hunstville, TX and East Texas in general.
Oh yeah, the Bears won 117-50 against the Bearkats and set a new school record for most points scored. Rumor is that "Mulkey" is the mythical spelling for Jezebel...Tom Robbins' Jezebel that is.
Sic 'em Lady Bears.
Labels: LadyBears Hoops